Removed Mailchimp for Woocommerce for now, I think it was causing major problems. Will see if it helps some.  I also turned off the heartbeat check when logged in, except on edit screens.  That way every tab open won't constantly ping the site.

Site didn't go down over the weekend. I think we removed that problem.  Today, I also removed cron control from wordpress and added a real cron job to run every hour.